Posts made in December, 2009


Yes, yes, yes. It’s time. You know you sorta hate resolutions but you also sorta can’t help yourself. So here are my big plans for 2010. Gain no more than 15 pounds before January 14. (I like to start with something achievable.) Change underwear every day. First thing every morning, no matter what the weather, get sneakers on, go outside and steal neighbors’ mail in order to intercept personal checks. Get you-know-who to...

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Right now I feel like a little piece of towel fuzz that has fallen into the bath water. The water is rushing toward the drain and I’m in the little tidal-wavey part at the end going, “Heeeelp! I’m going under!” So much for the joy of the season. I’m in the final days of a massive food drive that I’m running out my house (because I’m a complete idiot), plus I have a work deadline. Oh, and the...

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Yourself the Elf


Posted By on Dec 9, 2009

Consider this a sub-post of the last blog. That way I can say that I did not break my promise about the Christmas/holiday debate being the topic of my next blog. (See Santa? I was a good girl on a technicality.) You tell me you want to know how to figure out your Elf names. No problem. A good way to start is to think of something your body does or a way that your body appears. For example my Elf name, Crinkles, came from the little...

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Hey! I made a game. I’m so creative sometimes. Look at me: I’m like a little Christmas Elf in Santa’s workshop. If I were an Elf, my Elf name would be Crinkles the Elf. I originally intended this as a drinking game, but since I imagine that most people will play in their cars I had to modify it a little bit. Here’s how you play: First, tune your radio to one of those stations that plays all holiday songs from...

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Dear Facebook: Poke this.


Posted By on Dec 2, 2009

Dear Facebook,  If I really wanted to poke my ex-boyfriend from high school, I probably wouldn’t have broken up with him in the first place. But thanks for the suggestion. Also, if he needs more friends, is it really my place to suggest them? I imagine that when we were going out I had lots of helpful suggestions for him. Clearly, he didn’t take them or we’d probably be married and possibly divorced by now. I...

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