I‘ve recently decided to let go of being the laundry police for the preteens and teens in this house. If people don’t put their clothes away … whatever. That’s on them. My only rule is this: You must return all laundry baskets from your room before I will do more laundry for you. This felt…Read More
Have you heard? Gwyneth Paltrow claims that she is the reason so many people do yoga. May I quote? I must: “Forgive me if this comes out wrong,” Paltrow continued, “but I went to do a yoga class in L.A. recently and the 22-year-old girl behind the counter was like, ‘Have you ever done yoga…Read More
The calendar is a bitch over the holidays, amiright? You know what would make things way better? If you made the calendar your bitch instead. And that, ladies, is exactly what I’ve done. This year, I cordially invite you to set aside December 26th to celebrate National Mom’s Day Off. This is a totally-made-up holiday…Read More
Hi, divorced people! Yes, the holidays are upon us. Whoop dee fucking hoo! What are you serving with your turkey this year? A side of resentment? Loneliness? Maybe some sickeningly sweet vengeance for dessert? A better question: Where will your sad little handoff be? The deserted HomeGoods parking lot in the middle of T-Day, so the…Read More
So I went to a thing on Sunday night. What I found funny about it, and what I still find a little funny, is that I spent $160+ for two tickets and I really had no idea what the heck I was going to. I spoke to the women who were sitting next to me,…Read More
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