According to Trish

not worth reading since 2009

Author: Trish

  • Decking the halls, divorce-style

    I’ve been beating my head against the wall for a few days trying to finish a blog about the holidays. Let me give you a feel for the tone of it how it was going — here are the first two lines: Oh, fuck me. The holidays are upon us. Now listen. I’m not just saying…

  • Hey there, Mr. Cosmic Soulmate Lover Man

    Oh, everybody is an expert. You married folk. You know it all, doncha? I used to know it all, too. Let me tell you something, people. This single-person world out here? It has changed a lot since most of you were in it. Sure, the whole online dating thing has been around for a while…

  • Daddy issues

    I grew up in a house with a man who didn’t know how to love me. Then I grew up and I married another one. Daddy issues are no joke. Today I put my darling little Benjamin in a barn jacket to take him to daycare. My dad used to have a coat like that,…

  • What will the neighbors say?

    I got my ass reamed tonight. The phone rang and by the time I hung it up 20 minutes later, my ear was chewed off and bleeding. There were a lot of nasty things said and the person on the other end of the line was mad, mad, mad at me. And I was mad, mad, mad…

  • Is it hippie or hippy? It’s probably both

    I started writing this one earlier in the week but I kept getting derailed by at least two of the following three things: kids with lingering fevers who just wanted to sit on me all day, deadlines that would just not go the hell away, and/or hot, late-night phone sex with mysterious gentlemen who use phrases…

  • Fun with Match.com

    For this entry, I’d like to treat you all to a little gem from a pal of mine. My friend Buck Stetka is one of the funniest people I know. He also happens to be a charter member of Trish’s Rescue Squad, a little (or not-so-little) group of friends who came out of the woodwork to…