Down, boys and girls. This is not a post about sex.
Un-fucking-fortunately, I might add.
I meant “quickie” in that this is just a quickie post because I’m tired and there’s still much to do before bed.
Here’s what I’m grateful for today:
FOUR WHOLE YEARS of having my darling little Benjamin in my life.
Four years of thinking, “This is the perfect age. If I could freeze him right here, as he is, I would.”
The sneaky suspicion that the Universe planted a BOY in my uterus so many years ago so that I would have to work through some of these I-don’t-understand-the-male-species issues that I have. Showering that kid with unconditional love — and getting it right back — has been healing.
A home-made chocolate birthday cake baked in my own kitchen by three pairs of hands.
Two chocolate-cake-batter-smeared mouths … although I regret my attempts to document them were thwarted.
Two recipes passed down for generations — resulting in the BEST cake and icing that will ever glide across anyone’s tastebuds. I could cry thinking about it.
A no-frills, old-fashioned, family-sittin’-around-the-table kid birthday party.
Seeing my kids delight in their cousins.
Watching my little guy dance with joy when unwrapping a truck that came with a dinosaur. Watching my mom enjoy knowing that her gift was a hit.
Loading up my car with all the donations people gave me to help out one of Benjamin’s daycare teachers, who had a horrible kitchen fire and lost a room’s worth of stuff (and who didn’t have renters’ insurance to replace it).
Having my mom tell me she was proud of me for helping this woman. Me telling her that I had a great example.
Once again, seeing my friends come together to help a stranger.
Once again, getting the affirmation that by and large, people are good and want to help each other.
A quiet house. Remnants of another birthday party, now past.
The bittersweet feeling that soon — any day now — I will look at my little guy and the last remaining bits of babyhood will be gone.
Good night all.